This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
