So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
