garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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