So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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