We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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