Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
