I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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