How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
