I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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