I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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