seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize