I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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