How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
