God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
