So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
