remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
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