the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
