My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
