16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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