butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
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