They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
