We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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