There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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