If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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