do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
