okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
This couple is walking their pig around campus
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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