You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Pooping to opera.
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