At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
