so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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