He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
