I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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