You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
