Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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