her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize
