I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
