talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
