you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
