no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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