I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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