this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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