porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
A+ Viking dick
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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