It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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