Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
