the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
