and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
