Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
pray to the hookup gods
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Randomize
