kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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