I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
