So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
