How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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