Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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