I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Randomize
