Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
